Let me stay in down for a moment....
Sometimes life seems very difficoult and it's now to me. I have a lot of things to do that what I want in my life however time goes by too fast and that's why I have to stop walking. I get lose all of my senses. Past, present and future of my life and what's going on right now, where am I going for. There are many many choises that make me nervous and frighten me because I'm in a down mood. I can't handle it at the moment but sometimes I could be high.
Many Kisses to our GOAL..
Good bye and thank you for giving us so sweet moment my sweet lovely home. I will cherish all of the memories that we had together in the little space.
Many kisses...
Many kisses...
Many kisses...
Many kisses...
Many kisses...
Many kisses...
Yummy!! It made me cry because I am happy to having such a wonderful boyfriend like Taka. I was crying while eating.
He finished his work and got back home around 1AM, I was still up at that time. I prepared something to eat for him because he always cooks something for me ,so I could eat as soon as I got home from work. However he didn't start to eat the meal which I cooked for him... instead of that he started to make something!! I thought that what a guy!! I cooked meal for him with my full of hart! even I was a bit tired after work. why he didn't like it !!! he should eat it! and he should say it's good as usual... but he said nothing and starting make other meal.... I was really mad and sad...
20min later, he brought something to the table, he said" Mako this is for you! "
.....
The day was white day , I had fogotten about it. " Thank you Taka and I love you, I really happy to having you as my BF, you made me cry again! happy tears forever!! "
たかへ
いつもありがとう。
素直になれない時、ごめんね。
でも、いつもたかの愛を感じることができるのは
たかが私の傍にいて、私を愛してくれているから。
この事実に甘えないように、私も精一杯たかを愛します!
愛してる
ありがとう
たかのまこより
Of course I sent him a gift at the valentine's day ^-^
Wow, It's getting colder and colder day by day. I feel the cold air and the winter smells when I woke up every morning.
I loved the snow when I little when we got a lots snow, it gave me energyies to play around with it forever , however it just disturbs for dliving now. It's a sad grown-up stuff isn't it? Sometimes I really wanna be back to my childhood, especially when I need to drive a white covered nasty road.
Anyway, Im back home, I am here in Japan now. I wanna enjoy this term too as well as when I was in the USA although I am dreaming about Hawaii. I will go to there in the near future. Hopefully soon I will be able to act it.
Things are going very well so far at least to my eyes YES. But I just need to make plans for my next stage. I do not want waste time, this life is only once, there isn't a spare one. I have to creat my own life by my brain and act and planning helps it a lot.
My daring, nephew(Daiki), mom and I went to Matushima! first small trip since i came back^^ was fun!
It's been 32 years since I was born. Time goes by so fast, I can feel it everyday and we are changing little by little surely. Why do I know this? because I can imagine 10 years ago - there is a big difference between now and that time even though I have been enjoy my life a lot.
So what was the biggest change in my life? I have experienced several big changes, however one of the biggest was when I made the decision of breaking up with my boyfriend whom I had been dating for 9 years. I would like to share this story and why I chose to take that step.
I met him when I was 19 years old and we fell in love with each other. At that time he was 23 years old. I was expecting something serious with him because since he was older than me and had a job,I felt he must be more mature than a college student and capable of a serious relationship. I think I wanted to get wisdom from him to help me grow. However, I had never thought about marriage because I was still so young. I had lots of things to do in my future. I was planning so many things for my life. He was a nice person who always cared about me. I really liked him.
After graduating from college, I got a job which offered a salary that was more than he earned at the time. I had also learned social skills quickly because the company sent me everywhere in Japan so I had to master how to get to know about people who were working with me in a short time and how to get along with them. I think I was good at that; I could be nice to my coworkers, I could be as mature as my customers even they were older than me. That was what was required of me by my job.
Soon after, I noticed that I couldn't get enough feeling of satisfaction from my boyfriend than what I was expecting in the beginning of the relationship even though I liked him a lot. Yes, I liked him a lot so I could be patient even though there was something missing in my mind. Actually, we were living together for 2 years till I went back to my home town. The reason for my return was my father's illness. However we had decided to keep the relationship and I promised to come back. As you can guess, we were going to be long distance relationship.
I can't believe it because we had been dating for 6 years since then. Though we could meet once in a while, it wasn't enough time for both of us to be like boyfriend and girlfriend.
At this time, I had been experiencing a lot of events in my life that made my mind more mature; I had to get a new job , I had to adapt to a new environment quickly, and I had to take care of my father. In the meantime my boyfriend's situation hadn't changed at all -no challenges. My dissatisfaction with him was increasing slowly but surely.
Eventually, I realized that I rose above him. That meant there was no reason to be with him. I was thinking for a while about what I should do - what was the meaning of being together with my boyfriend. My answer was to break it off. If we were meant to be we would bring growth to each other and we have to have respect for each other. If we don't give honor to each other then the bond will be missed.
In my case, I lost the honor to my boyfriend by rising above him. I wanted to rely on him, I wanted to get more wisdomfrom him however I couldn't. I was sure there wasn't value to be with him anymore. After breaking up with him, my life seemed changed a lot. I felt a big feeling of freedom and my future seemed very bright. I had started to make a new plan with my new life with a lot of joy. It was completely different from what I was imagining of the situation after breaking up with him. If I had decided to be with him, my life might be a totally different.
I am having a good time and I am happy. That means I have been making right decisions in my life. It all started when I experienced the biggest change in my life - the break-up with my boyfriend whom I had been dating for 9 years.
Do you enjoy to play violent video games? Acutually, I really hate playing any video games. It cause of my strong headache, in addition my shoulders will become stiff by staring the monitor for a long time.
However, many people around the world are enjoy playing them against me. Even my lovely nephew who is having happy time with games sometimes.
In my opinion, I don't think all of games are not good. In fact I saw some interestig games in them -playing sports with friends even inside of house -even though I would prefer to go out for playing over it.
Anyway, I am strongly disagree with the violent video games because it is one of ways to know how to make people get hurt physically even though it is not real. Most of the people who play video games are teenager, why do they need to learn about it? Therefore, I want youth to watch good movies with good friends, reading a good book and playing any sports with thier mates. I believe that they can be grow up and practice any kinds of social skill in a natural way just like we used to be.
Well.. these days, we have been struggling a little bit in our life, especially my bf. Because, he is trying to make it happen for our future, however sometimes it loses out even though he has been doing your his best.
But, that is all right.
I know we are human, each of us have pride. However there is a time to forget all our pride that is what we have been developed in our life so far. when it break down to get start over, we need to be patient and be strong.
Actually, he was a bit upset at the moment, so I wanted to cheer him up. so I've sent an e-mail to him as my yell.
Dear my BF ,
sometimes people needs to swallow your pride for moving on to the next step of your life.
without struggling you will never get into the next stage and you will never see your world.
keep your eye on to the purpose and keep going to get it!
you must be passionate and crazy about your dream, then everything around you will be changed by your passion.
Now we are really enjoying our life , because we can use full of our senses which given by god.
Thanks a lot.
Do you know the odds of pregnancy?
All I know is it is a miracle odds to get pregnant.
Why I am saying this? because I wanna have a baby! I am 32 years old and getting older even I can be young at heart. However men have no need to worry about this. envy men! Anyway, I have started reading articles about Baby- making basics, just in case in my future(near!) But! I do not want to think about this tooo much because I don't want to be eager to try having sex just for making baby!
be natural monica !!
According to this article.... this is an intricate series of events. How do you feel when you heard of it?
hahaha, In my opinion, the most important thing is to fallow our instinct. . Our body knows evrything even though i cannot explain about it in words.
It is a miracle if I could get pregnant and would have a beatiful baby, it is something like a fate and it is very similar to meet someone special in the greatest world. There we can see the odds and how happiness we would be able to get. That is why
I am curious how the miracle can be happen.
↑my lovely nephew. I can't wait to see you!!!
Baby-making basics
Conception is based on an intricate series of events.
Every month, hormones from your pituitary gland stimulate your ovaries to release an egg, or ovulate. This often happens around day 14 of the menstrual cycle, although the exact timing may vary among women or even from month to month.
Once the egg is released, it travels to the fallopian tube. If you want to conceive, now's the time. The egg has about 24 hours to unite with a sperm. Since sperm cells can survive in your reproductive tract for two to three days, it's best to have regular sex during the days leading up to ovulation.
If the egg is fertilized, it'll travel to the uterus two to four days later. There it'll attach to the uterine lining. You're pregnant! Your periods will stop as your body begins to support the embryo.
If the egg isn't fertilized, it'll break down and you'll have your next period as usual.
Now you know how much percentage makes it happen. So we are all miracle aren't we? Miracle makes Miracle!
The next step that we have to move on.
We are planning to get married in June next year^0~
Finally we made our disicion, even though we've been dating only for a year since we met^^
To be honest, I've never imagined this situation at the beginning of our relationship. I didn't push myself, I felt just I wanted to be with him forever, because I realized that he is the only person who could understands about me deeply and he is the only person who loves me deeply.
He was here for two weeks druing my summer vacation. I really appreciate him to came here for me . He was treating me very well that made me feel so comfortable and gave me the greatest satisfaction. I was going to be sure that I love him so much.
At this time, he noticed that I like to be here in the US and that made his mind change. He has dicided to come here to let me stay here and the matter of necessity is he needs to get a job. He was thinking a lot while we were stay in SF . The result was to start a new business . We never know it's gonna be successful or not, however we are so excited to move to the next step and the next stage of our life.
We are on our way to our future now, and it's probably another way that most people would do. But, I am sure I really like the kind of life. Life must be advanture ! I We can deal with any problam together if it would come up in our future and we would be able to overcome in any situation, because we are mean to be with.
Thanks^0~ read more
on moving on!